How do I become a better decision-maker?
Becoming a better decision-maker starts with recognizing the patterns that drive your choices — both conscious and unconscious. Good decision-makers are not people who never doubt themselves, but people who know how to structure their thinking, use their emotions without being swept away by them, and who dare to act even when information is incomplete. This article answers the most frequently asked questions about decision-making, from the fundamentals to practical techniques you can apply right away.
What makes someone a good decision-maker?
A good decision-maker is someone who can weigh relevant information, recognize their own biases, and make a choice that aligns with their values and goals — even under pressure. It is not about perfect outcomes, but about a solid process that consistently produces good results.
Good decision-makers stand out in several concrete ways. They are clear about what they want to achieve before making a choice. They ask the right questions instead of jumping straight to a solution. They are willing to test their initial instinct against facts or the perspectives of others. And they accept that uncertainty is part of every decision.
Personal leadership plays a central role here. Those who lead themselves well know what their values are, recognize their own blind spots, and take responsibility for the consequences of their choices. That self-awareness is not a luxury — it is the foundation of effective decision-making.
Why do people so often make poor decisions?
People make poor decisions primarily because the brain relies on all kinds of cognitive shortcuts that are useful in many situations but go wrong in complex or stressful circumstances. These shortcuts — commonly known as cognitive biases — cause us to process information selectively, misjudge risks, and make choices based on what feels familiar rather than what is logical.
A few common pitfalls:
- Confirmation bias: you unconsciously seek out information that confirms your existing beliefs and ignore anything that contradicts them.
- Sunk cost fallacy: you keep going with something because you have already invested a great deal of time or money in it, even when stopping would be the better choice.
- Overconfidence: you overestimate your own knowledge or the certainty of an outcome.
- Group pressure: you adjust your judgment to match what the group seems to expect, even when you privately disagree.
Time pressure also plays a significant role. The more rushed you are, the less deliberately you think and the more you fall back on automatic patterns. Recognizing these mechanisms is the first step toward being less controlled by them.
How do emotions affect your decisions?
Emotions influence every decision you make, even when you think you are reasoning in a purely rational way. Research in neuroscience shows that people who lack emotional capacity actually make worse decisions, because emotions carry essential signals about what matters to you. The goal is not to switch emotions off, but to use them consciously.
Fear can make you cautious, which is useful when the stakes are high, but it can also be paralyzing when it holds you back from choices you genuinely want to make. Enthusiasm can motivate you and drive you to act, but it can also lead you to underestimate obstacles. Anger can clarify what you will not accept, but at the same time it clouds your ability to see alternatives.
A practical approach when facing an important decision is to first name the emotion you are experiencing and what it is telling you. Then ask yourself whether that emotion is rooted in the current situation or in an earlier pattern. That distinction is what separates emotion as a compass from emotion as an obstacle.
What techniques help you make better decisions?
There are several proven techniques that directly improve your decision-making. The most effective ones are not complicated, but they do require discipline in their application. Good decision-makers build up a personal repertoire of methods they draw on depending on the situation.
The weighted pros and cons list
A classic pros and cons list becomes far more powerful when you assign a weight to each point based on how important it is to you. This way, you see not only how many arguments there are, but also how much each one matters. It forces you to make your priorities explicit.
The 10/10/10 method
For any decision, ask yourself: how will I feel about this in ten minutes, ten months, and ten years? This method helps you step out of the emotional heat of the moment and gain a broader perspective. Decisions that feel right across all three time horizons are generally the strongest ones.
Reversing the question
Instead of asking “what is the best choice?”, ask yourself: “which choice do I most want to avoid, and why?” By reasoning from what you do not want, you implicitly reveal what your values are and which direction best aligns with your goals.
How do you make a decision when you have insufficient information?
When you do not have enough information, the best approach is to determine which information is truly critical, gather that information deliberately, and then act on the best available picture. Waiting for complete certainty is rarely an option in most situations — and it seldom leads to better outcomes anyway.
Start with the question: what information would actually change my decision? Much of the information we seek is pleasant to have but does not meaningfully alter the outcome. Once you can identify what truly matters, you also know where to focus your energy.
Next, use a threshold approach: decide in advance how much certainty you need in order to act. Sometimes seventy percent certainty is enough to move forward, especially when the cost of waiting is higher than the cost of a potential mistake. This is also a core principle of personal leadership: daring to act without a guarantee of success.
Finally, it helps to make your decision reversible wherever possible. If you can reverse or adjust a choice based on new information, you significantly reduce the risk — and at the same time lower the threshold for getting started in the first place.
When is it smart to delay a decision?
Delaying a decision is smart when waiting will demonstrably give you better information or a more favorable position, and when the cost of waiting is lower than the cost of making the wrong choice. Delay as a strategy is very different from delay driven by fear or avoidance.
There are specific situations in which delaying is the right move:
- You are under emotional pressure and know that your judgment is distorted as a result.
- Specific information you need is missing but will become available within a reasonable timeframe.
- The situation is still evolving and an early decision would close off better options.
- You have not yet spoken with people whose perspective is genuinely important.
Delay is not smart when it stems from uncertainty about yourself rather than uncertainty about the situation. If you are waiting because you are afraid of making a mistake or of being judged, that is a signal to work on your self-confidence — not to keep pushing the decision further down the road.
How do you build confidence in your own judgment?
You build confidence in your own judgment by systematically reflecting on decisions you have made, learning from their outcomes, and recognizing patterns in when your judgment is sound and when it is not. It is not about convincing yourself that you are always right, but about developing an honest and evolving picture of your own strengths and blind spots.
Practical steps that help:
- Keep a decision journal: record your choices, the reasoning behind them, and later the outcome. Over time, patterns will emerge.
- Ask targeted feedback questions: not “what did you think of it?” but “at what point could I have done something differently?”
- Celebrate good processes, not just good outcomes: a good decision can still produce a poor outcome due to bad luck. That does not make the process wrong.
- Expose yourself to new situations: every new domain in which you make decisions and learn from them expands your overall decision-making capacity.
Confidence in your judgment also grows as you gain a better understanding of the unwritten rules in your environment. Those who understand how organizations and people truly function — who holds which interests and which dynamics are at play — make better and more confident decisions. That strategic insight is a skill you can develop.
How InTouch helps with decisiveness and personal leadership
Making better decisions is not an innate talent — it is a skill you can train. At InTouch Women, we help ambitious women do exactly that: strengthen their decision-making ability, sharpen their strategic insight, and take charge of their careers and their influence with greater confidence.
In our Masterclass Stratego voor Vrouwen, participants spend six months working on the core of personal leadership. You will specifically learn to:
- Understand the unwritten rules of organizations and respond to them strategically
- Use your own strengths as the foundation for confident decision-making
- Handle pressure, politics, and competing group interests without losing yourself
- Conduct stakeholder analyses so you know who plays which role in your environment
- Apply concrete strategies that work immediately in everyday practice
The program is built on nearly 30 years of proven expertise and the bestselling method Stratego voor Vrouwen. Want to find out what we can do for you or your organization? Get in touch and we will explore the best approach together.