How do I become a better decision-maker?
Becoming a better decision-maker starts with recognizing the patterns that drive your decision-making — both conscious and unconscious. Good decision-makers are not those who never doubt themselves, but those who know how to structure their thinking, use their emotions without being swept away by them, and who dare to act even when information is incomplete. This article answers the most frequently asked questions about decision-making, from the basic principles to concrete techniques you can apply right away.
What makes someone a good decision-maker?
A good decision-maker is someone who can weigh relevant information, recognize their own biases, and make a choice that aligns with their values and goals — even under pressure. It is not about perfect outcomes, but about a solid process that consistently produces good results.
Good decision-makers stand out in a number of concrete ways. They are clear about what they want to achieve before making a choice. They ask the right questions instead of jumping straight to a solution. They are willing to test their initial instinct against facts or the perspectives of others. And they accept that uncertainty is part of every decision.
Personal leadership plays a central role in this. Those who lead themselves well know what their values are, are aware of their own blind spots, and take responsibility for the consequences of their choices. That self-awareness is not a luxury — it is the foundation of effective decision-making.
Why do people so often make poor decisions?
People make poor decisions primarily because the brain uses all kinds of cognitive shortcuts that are useful in many situations but go off the rails in complex or stressful circumstances. These shortcuts, also known as cognitive biases, cause us to process information selectively, misjudge risks, and make choices based on what feels familiar rather than what is logical.
A few common pitfalls:
- Confirmation bias: you unconsciously seek out information that confirms your existing belief and ignore anything that contradicts it.
- Sunk cost fallacy: you keep going with something because you have already invested a lot of time or money in it, even when stopping would be the better choice.
- Overconfidence: you overestimate your own knowledge or the certainty of an outcome.
- Peer pressure: you adjust your judgment to match what the group seems to expect, even when you privately disagree.
Time pressure also plays a major role. The more rushed you are, the less consciously you think and the more you fall back on automatic patterns. Recognizing these mechanisms is the first step toward being less driven by them.
How do emotions affect your decisions?
Emotions influence every decision you make, even when you think you are reasoning purely rationally. Research in neuroscience shows that people without emotional capacity actually make worse decisions, because emotions contain essential signal information about what matters to you. The goal is not to switch emotions off, but to use them consciously.
Fear can make you cautious, which is useful when the stakes are high, but it can also be paralyzing when it holds you back from choices you actually want to make. Enthusiasm can motivate you and spur you to act, but it can also lead to underestimating obstacles. Anger can bring clarity about what you will not accept, while at the same time clouding your ability to see alternatives.
A practical approach is to start by naming the emotion you are experiencing when facing an important decision, and asking yourself what that emotion is telling you. Then ask whether that emotion is based on the current situation or on a recurring pattern. That distinction makes all the difference between emotion as a compass and emotion as an obstacle.
What techniques help you make better decisions?
There are several proven techniques that directly improve your decision-making. The most effective ones are not complicated, but they do require discipline in their application. Good decision-makers build a personal repertoire of methods they deploy depending on the situation.
The weighted pros and cons list
A classic pros and cons list becomes far more powerful when you assign a weight to each point based on how important it is to you. This way, you see not only how many arguments there are, but also how much each one counts. It forces you to make your priorities explicit.
The 10/10/10 method
For every decision, ask yourself: how will I feel about this in ten minutes, ten months, and ten years? This method helps you step out of the emotional heat of the moment and gain a broader perspective. Decisions that feel right across all three time horizons are generally the strongest ones.
Reversing the question
Instead of asking “what is the best choice?”, ask yourself: “which choice do I most want to avoid, and why?” By reasoning from what you do not want, you implicitly clarify what your values are and which direction best aligns with your goals.
How do you make a decision when you have insufficient information?
When you have insufficient information, the best approach is to determine which information is truly critical, seek it out in a targeted way, and then act on the basis of the best available picture. Waiting for complete certainty is not an option in most situations, and it rarely leads to better outcomes anyway.
Start with the question: what information would genuinely change my decision? Much of the information we seek is nice to have, but does not materially alter the outcome. Once you can identify what truly matters, you also know where to focus your energy.
Next, use a threshold approach: decide in advance how much certainty you need in order to act. Sometimes seventy percent certainty is enough to move forward, especially when the cost of waiting is higher than the cost of a potential mistake. This is also a core principle of personal leadership: having the courage to act without a guarantee of success.
Finally, it helps to make your decision reversible wherever possible. If you can undo or adjust a choice based on new information, you significantly reduce the risk and at the same time lower the barrier to getting started in the first place.
When is it smart to delay a decision?
Delaying a decision is smart when waiting demonstrably gives you better information or a more favorable position, and when the cost of waiting is lower than the cost of making the wrong call. Delay as a strategy is very different from delay driven by fear or avoidance.
There are concrete situations in which delaying is the right move:
- You are under emotional pressure and know that your judgment is distorted as a result.
- Specific information is missing but will become available within a reasonable timeframe.
- The situation is still evolving and an early decision would close off better options.
- You have not yet spoken with people whose perspective is genuinely important.
Delay is not smart when it stems from uncertainty about yourself rather than uncertainty about the situation. If you are waiting because you are afraid of making a mistake or of being judged, that is a signal to work on your self-confidence — not to keep putting the decision off.
How do you build trust in your own judgment?
You build trust in your own judgment by systematically reflecting on decisions you have made, learning from the outcomes, and recognizing patterns in when your judgment is sound and when it is not. It is not about convincing yourself that you are always right, but about building an honest and evolving picture of your own strengths and blind spots.
Practical steps that help:
- Keep a decision journal: record your choices, the reasoning behind them, and later the outcome. Over time, patterns will emerge.
- Ask targeted feedback questions: not “what did you think of it?” but “at what point could I have done something differently?”
- Celebrate good processes, not just good outcomes: a good decision can produce a bad outcome due to bad luck. That does not make the process wrong.
- Expose yourself to new situations: every new domain in which you make and learn from decisions expands your overall decision-making capacity.
Trust in your judgment also grows as you gain a better grasp of the unwritten rules in your environment. Those who understand how organizations and people truly function — who has which interests and what dynamics are at play — make better and more confident decisions. That strategic insight is a skill you can develop.
How InTouch helps with decisiveness and personal leadership
Making better decisions is not an innate talent — it is a skill you can train. At InTouch Women, we help ambitious women do exactly that: strengthen their decision-making ability, sharpen their strategic insight, and take charge of their careers and their influence with greater confidence.
In our Masterclass Stratego voor Vrouwen, participants spend six months working on the core of personal leadership. Specifically, you will learn to:
- See through the unwritten rules of organizations and respond to them strategically
- Use your own strengths as the foundation for confident decision-making
- Handle pressure, politics, and competing group interests without losing yourself
- Conduct stakeholder field analyses so you know who plays which role in your environment
- Apply concrete strategies that work immediately in everyday practice
The program is built on nearly 30 years of proven expertise and the bestselling method Stratego voor Vrouwen. Want to find out what we can do for you or your organization? Get in touch and we will explore the best approach together.